The Hardest Thing

You know what it is. The hardest thing to do is to accept God's will. Most of us want to be in so much control of our own lives. I am definitely one of those people. Society in a whole has shunned God AND His will. How do you expect to recover from something if our first instinct is to expect someone else to take care of it?

The Unknown

Why do we as humans worry about the unknown, when all we need to do is rely on our faith in God that He will take care of us? Not so simple. It took me going through quite a bit to fully understand the meaning of faith and knowing that God was in my corner... not just hoping He was, and hoping for the best.

I know I can be harsh at times. God knows my heart. I want to serve Him. 

Taking it for what it is...

I received some disheartening news today about a family member, ending in the prognosis of having 3-6 months to live. That is definitely a reality check. Here are my thoughts:

You only live once. 

As corny as this may sound, it's true as true can be. We have to make our lives what we will before it's gone. We are here to spread the word of God and to live in His image. This does not mean go crazy. :) Look within yourself and ask these questions..

1.) Am I doing what I know in my heart I am designed to do? 
2.) Am I making a positive difference in a life of someone? 
3.) Am I bringing joy to others so Christ is seen in me?"

I ask myself the first question often. I often find myself trying to please others first, instead of doing what needs to be done. I don't want to be thought of as the "bad guy" so I tend to put what I truly know in my heart, a little to the side. Then one day, out of the blue, I wake up and am like... what am I doing? I need to make a change. Well, easier said than done. I have envisioned myself working with missionaries at some point, or photographing God's glory. That might happen. It might not. But I can still close my eyes and imagine the ways I can glorify Him.

The second question, without a doubt, I learned the answer from my mom, and have lived it ever since. I try to be the "glass half full" girl most of the time, projecting positive energy and encouragement on those who are having it a bit rough. Of course, I can't please all people all of the time, so I just do my best.

The third question... My answer is always the same... "not enough"

• Don't waste your time on negative people.
• Be the glorious person God made you to be.
• Realize that you don't really "need" anyone but Him, and that He will be your best friend and biggest supporter.
• Use your one life to make a difference in a life of someone. Though nothing tangible may come of it, the intrinsic reward is overwhelming. Even if it's just a smile, hug, handshake, surprise card in the mail, text or a phone call... Just do it.
• Be the person you're meant to be, no one else.
• Step out of the box of normalcy, dive into His grace and acceptance, and in your heart, you'll know what to do.
• Do not deny yourself the grace of God. Feel it. Live it. Be thankful for it.

For my cousin that has just been slammed with a brick wall, and is not even digesting it yet... Take comfort in the fact that God is here, as He has always been, right beside you on your journey. Talk to Him, pray to Him, and feel peace that it is all part of His plan. I'm not going to lie and say it didn't shock me as well. Memories come flooding back of other events that have happened over the last 15 years. Do what you need to do, be who you need to be, say what you need to say, go where you need to go. No holds barred. Just be your wonderful self that you have always been. You are in my prayers and in my heart. I love you.

Priorities.... as suggested by a friend.

One of my best friends needed to write tonight. I was very happy to hear that... seeing as soon as I saw it, I realized that I needed to write as well, which leads me to writing this blog. Her subject... Priorities.
Interesting, as I have written things about priorities many times, but not in a while, so here it goes.

If I had only known what I know now twenty years ago, my life would have probably went in a different direction. Hence, I have made my share of mistakes along the journey, some for the better, some not. But I do consider myself a happy person, for the most part... besides being a bit bossy, and a little demanding, my family and most of my friends would agree. :)

Many of you don't know what it was like to grow up as an only child, even though I have a wonderful sister. Besides my parents going through 24 years of public schooling with us, I was raised most of my growing years with just them. So, I was an only child at home... a little bit spoiled, and a little used to getting what I wanted, one way or another... although I did learn to work for it. I just used the tools that were given to me at an early age, including the constant support from my mom and dad (thank you).  I loved being able to share something, some part of my life at the moment, with my friends and family, not just because I knew they would like it, but because it made me feel good inside.

Most of my family mean the world to me. Some are not as close as they were because of choices they made. A little disappointing, but not in my control, and I can't be irritated or bothered by something that I cannot change. So I have learned to live with it.

A best friend. Someone who means the world to me, that I love like family. Someone who knows me, well, sometimes better than I know myself. Someone who knows what to say when I really don't want to hear anything, or hear the truth. Someone who makes time in their life, and someone I make time for.
It's funny, because I've often been asked who my best friend is, and I'll usually list a few. And then comes the argument that a best friend is singular, one. Well, I redefine that. I have many best friends. Some were, are, and will be for the rest of my life.

One of my favorite quotes is "Never make anyone a priority who chooses to make you their option."

Some of my 2013 priorities aren't what some think, and others may already know... but thanks to one of my best friends, I'll share what mine are. :)


1) Let others see God move through me. This, at times, can be challenging for the fear of not doing what the "in" crowd expects or appreciates. To me, the only One who matters in ANY instance is God above. He's the only one I will answer to. In doing that, I am honoring my dad in Heaven, and respecting my mom here.

2) Talk to my family more frequently. Trust me, this should be a priority for many. I try to talk to my mother at least twice a week. Would eat with her if she was still in Houston! Debbie is a little busier than Mom, but I still try to communicate often. I wish I could still talk to my dad. :)

3) Give of myself. Generosity is extremely important to me. Not necessarily monetary gifts, but gifts of time, listening, friendship, companionship, sisterhood, etc.

4) Take notice in the little things. I love breathing in all the beauty that is around us. Ideal weather is happening now. Since being over 40, I have paid attention to more of the things and people that I surround myself with much more than I did twenty years ago. Like I said... if I had only known.


5) Keep in touch with those who people mean something to you, friends and family. To send a simple handwritten note to someone in your past, just to let them know you care, and that you remember them. Makes my heart smile.

6) Make integrity a part of my core structure when working with anyone. Whether in personal affairs or business relationships, I try to create a trust that won't be exploited or broken. 

7) Travel to see something I have yet to see. I love to explore, as long as it's not 116 degrees. Hidden facts, old buildings with stories attached. I so want to write and photograph a book of that... even an ebook. :)

8) Never put a limit on what I can do. Goes back to what Mom and Dad taught me. It's in my blood. There is possibility in everything. Make that list. Do something that makes you laugh. Make a memory.

9) Realize life is a series of choices. Good ones, bad ones... it is. And choices usually have consequences. Every choice I have made has led me to where I am at this exact moment. Do I have regrets? Not really. The accumulation has helped me grow into the person I am.

10) Listen to more music and take more pictures. Some might think this is impossible, but I love music, and I love pictures. Music is like a soundtrack to my life. Photos are just the visual. :)

I know that I am blessed, beyond comparison, and am thankful that Jesus Christ died for my sins. You know, God has given me so much in my life to be thankful for, and I could in no way write all of it down. I am so thankful that I have sweet fun memories of my life, and a couple of crazy, scary ones too... but they are mine. Sound selfish? It's not. I know that in my heart, they are my memories. No one will walk away with the same feelings or the same story. So, next time you do something fun and exciting, when you talk to an old friend, when you find that picture from high school, close your eyes and smile... know that you have made an imprint on your heart, sometimes that you are revisiting.

for all of you that have made an imprint, thank you.
love you all.
Phil 1:3