Be The One

It makes you a little stronger

When you're trust is put to the test.

Makes you rely on your faith

And let God handle the rest.

Letting go isn't that easy

When it hurts your heart,

When you realize ones you care about

In your life may not be a part.

But we are taught to forgive,

To look past the hurt and sorrow.

Look beyond the reasoning

And look forward to tomorrow.

There are many things in life

That are beyond our control.

It's how you react

That shapes the story that is told.

Take yourself out of the equation.

Focus on only good.

Be not the friend that can't let go,

Be the one that could.

All That Matters

Grab my heart,

Surround me with peace,

Help me reach for the stars,

Yet drop to my knees.

Let me feel your presence

Through the clouds.

Make Your mission

Clear and loud.

Move my hand,

Let me serve,

Teach me how

To live Your word.

Let me see

Through Your eyes.

Forget mistakes

And forgive the lies.

Heal the hurt

I hold inside,

Open my wings

And let me fly.

Feel the wind

Beneath my wings,

Close my eyes

And gently sing

The words of want

You have for me,

The notes of love

To feel and see.

All that matters

Is in Your hands.

Masterpiece in the Making

When darkness falls upon your soul

And your wings forget how to fly,

When the kindness that resides within

Has somewhat said goodbye,

When doubt clouds your judgement,

And your heart feels like breaking,

Remember this simple fact...

You are a masterpiece in the making.

Every road you have taken,

Every choice you have made,

Every line you have crossed,

Every debt you have paid,

Every life you have loved,

Every wrinkle you have earned,

Every friend you have welcomed,

Every truth you have learned...

When tears begin to fill your eyes

And sadness is overtaking,

Take comfort in the fact...

You are a masterpiece in the making.

Love While You Can

The older I get, the more I realize how important it is to tell those you care about and love. It matters not what you have in the physical sense... material possessions mean nothing... what matters most comes from your heart... no where else.

Reminds me of a song by Kellie Coffey, "At The End Of The Day" 

These words resonate... "At the end of the day, did I laugh and dance enough; Did I tell my friends how much they really mean to me? At the end of the day, did I really push myself; Or was I too afraid to give my heart away, at the end of the day"

In this world of disorder, uncaring, and selfishness, remember that God wants us to love, give, and reflect Him. So when you turn in for the evening... think about your day, think about how it went, what was good, what you would do different, but most importantly, where your heart was at.

Did that make you smile? If it didn't, try something different tomorrow, and realize what is ultimately important. God made your heart to share, care, and love. Take a chance. It will be worth it.

My Choice

I choose...
To worry about myself, to pray about myself, and above all, to love myself.

I choose...
To let go of things that are out of my control, to let go of people who choose to walk, and to let God "do" more often.

I choose...
To better myself as a Christian, to remember to "love thy neighbor", to take the time to thank those who make a difference in my life.

I choose...
To keep my memories close to my heart, to share only what I feel safe sharing, and to remember what I love to do.

I choose...
To not listen to people make excuses... to make wiser decisions on who I let enter my life and who stays in my life.

I choose...
To be happy, to smile more, eat good food, exercise more, and to love those I love, with abandon, because I can.

I choose...
To forgive what I've held on to, ask forgiveness for what I need to, and try to not put myself in situations where I have to choose the better of two evils.

Defining Moment

There is nothing quite like the moment you realize that your time in someones life is complete.

Not necessarily a pretty moment, but a necessary moment to say the least. Happy and sad. God has many blessings for me that are beyond my realm of thinking. He puts me in positions that I never would put myself in. He lets me be introduced to those that I would otherwise never meet. However, when you have that defining moment that your purpose in the life of someone has come to an end, it's bittersweet. It may not be forever, but in this moment, right now, my purpose has been served.

So you are wondering how can I be so final about this decision? I feel it on my heart to help, to love, to give, and to forgive... help when I can help, love when it's warranted (and sometimes when it's not), give when it's needed, and forgive when it's called for.

I have been accused of "not living my life" when that is all I have been doing. I live my life each day, with purpose, with my heart focused on what it needs to be focused on. Whether you are part of that focus sometimes depends on you. If you wish not to be, that is your decision. But my God knows my heart, I just try to do what He wants. Sometimes it runs me ragged, makes me tired, causes tears, yet at times the ragged can be from being so full of Him that I'm happy, being tired can mean being tired of the ordinary routine, and the tears can be tears of joy. It's all how you look at it. I try to keep a positive focus, with positive thoughts about my life. Sometimes, even that is difficult.

I just hope those who I have been blessed with loving, knowing and calling my friend, at some point along my life's journey... know the impact they have made in my life. Whether it be a friend for a while, or one of little time, or just an acquaintance, there is a reason.

When a relationship/friendship ends up breaking you down instead of building you up, it's time to reevaluate the reason and purpose you are in there. It's usually not the intent, but often it happens.

But sometimes these defining moments don't make us better, they make us great. We can take what we have learned and apply forward for the rest of our lives. What a concept. Like paying it forward.

I'm not saying forget these people who were so important, or write them off, I'm saying thank them for shaping you. Thank God for allowing them to be in your life even for a moment. Look back and think of how dull and boring your life could have been without them in it.

The Given

Have you ever given so much of yourself, that you almost begin to feel like you have nothing left to give? Yet, we are called to give of ourselves given the opportunity. When is enough actually enough? Who sets that limit? Do we set our own limits? Or should we rely on God to help with the parameters and boundaries?

Hopefully things usually work out on their own, either making it easier on both parties involved, or making a clean break... which sometimes is collateral damage if there isn't any common ground.

I have given a lot in my life. I've been stepped on, used, taken advantage of, and judged. But that doesn't change the fact that I am who I am. I do what I do. Nothing compares to a servant's heart. Many have said that it's not smart to trust people so easily, that I'll get hurt. But I am confident that my God knows my heart, knows my intentions, and I only worry about what He thinks as opposed to the many others who have put on a judgement robe.

On the flip side... I have been blessed at an indescribable level, I have been touched to my soul by some of the most extraordinary ordinary people, have worked alongside many servants of Christ, and have hopefully provided some light into those lives that so desperately need to see Him.

So why is it, that in this society we live in today, do people question intent? Characters are at stake, integrity is on the line. Do people not have any faith in humanity anymore? Are we all out to get somebody to make us look better? Is the end result for us what we are truly looking for? Be honest with yourself. Why do you do the things you do? For yourself? For others? Is it because somewhere deep inside, you have an ulterior motive? A plan? Will it make you look better? What's in it for you? Are you being selfish?

Or... Do you truly have a servant's heart? In Philippians 2:3-5, we are told to "Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus" 

How can we NOT put others before us? When is says that in humility we are to count others more significant than ourselves?

I live my life with no regrets. None. I never wish I am different than God has chosen me to be. I question Him at times, which leaves me wondering. For all the people I have met in my life, they have shaped me into who I am. Some people have been great influences, others, not so much, but each has played a significant role in my journey.

At times, I get tired of having to explain myself, defend myself, or reason with those who choose not to believe what I'm saying, or fail to understand the significance of my giving. I have been told that I am generous to a fault. I believe that you can never be generous to a fault. You can't "over give." However, you can change the way you give, what you give, and how you give it, so that the recipient won't feel overwhelmed or guilty for receiving. That's never the intent, though sometimes it has been the result. I am human. I am far from perfect, and I tend to over think things at times. But if you know me, know that what I do, when I do it, is not about me. God gets the glory. All of it.

My prayer this evening: "God, please remind me in my heart, why I do what I do, and to keep You at the center of it all. Help me communicate in a way that puts who I care about at ease. Let them feel your presence and grace. Please forgive any glimpse of doubt that I see, and help me to focus on You and Your will. Please keep my heart soft and loving and help me let go of the things I need to let go of, and live my life with purpose. Forgive me for bad decisions I have made and thoughts I have had, and sins I have committed. Thank you for the smile on my face and in my heart. Without You, life would be nothing. Bless the beautiful person reading this today, and let their heart open to see something new. In Jesus Christ's name, Amen."

Thanks to my mother for this subtle reminder...
Galatians 6:10, King James Version (KJV) As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.